the spaces between your fingers
by Wintry Leen
Summary: She would like to fill every void space with her warmth. Oneshot. SasuSaku. #13


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto in any way possible.

**Author's Note:** This was inspired by a prompt from last year's SSMonth: holding hands. I thought it'd only take me less than a thousand words to complete this fic but darn feels. Also you may find this confusing because I'm trying a new style. Some phrases may sound awkward and there is an excessive usage of "and" and minimal usage of the comma because I'm aiming for a _continuous flow without pauses_. It's a newbie's version of the famous stream of consciousness technique, and I know I fail because apparently this is my own consciousness, not the characters'. Anyway, reviews are greatly appreciated.

P.S. Try listening to Fireflight's _Wrapped In Your Arms_ while reading. :)

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_**the spaces between your fingers**_

Uchiha Sasuke did not say anything that day but somehow he ended up walking together with Sakura from Konoha Hospital back to his manor and after that from Ichiraku's to his training ground and still for the following days her hand held his in an open embrace while he kept his hand shut and he kept telling himself he was pushing her away but she just could not get a hint.

He particularly remembered the day – and just for the record not the night – when he went to Konoha Hospital a month ago to have his wound tended by Sakura and there really was no considerable reason behind his decision to ask for Sakura but just that he had gotten used to her presence it somehow felt comfortable.

He muttered a thanks and exited the building when he realized her presence beside him and felt something foreign because her hand enclosed his and he wordlessly wished she would let go but that when she smiled, he knew she was not like anyone else.

Silence was his friend. There was no need for words and it would discourage people from spewing nonsense if the only thing he could offer back was his stoic face. But it was a different case when it came to her because she absolutely misunderstood and thought that his silence meant acceptance.

His silence was blameless though because he would like to blame the warmth of her hand seeping through him whenever she cradled his hand. He had chosen to be cold because the cold numbed whatever sensation he could not accept feeling but when her palm touched the back of his hand his mind was suddenly filled with warm nights and gentle mornings and he thought it felt like home – forgetting that he actually resided in an abandoned and soulless manor and he would have to sleep there alone whether he liked it or not and without her hand keeping his hand (and heart) comfortably warm.

He did not want to think about the implication of the intimacy she initiated but he soon had found himself yielding because her touch was so warm he stopped feeling dead. There were times though that the desire to touch back was overwhelming he just had to pull away but Sakura would not let him – she would squeeze his fisted hand more lovingly when he tried to wriggle out of her grasp – and he just knew he was fighting a losing battle.

They would usually walk in silence except when she started to talk about her day. Until one day he finally decided to talk her out of her routine because her touch was becoming so familiar to him he started to become afraid of seeing strands of pink and splatters of red. He noted how annoying it was that she latched onto him like that when clearly being just his teammate and _maybe_ friend should have been enough.

"This is enough, Sakura. I'm not going anywhere and you're annoying."

"But your hand still feels so cold."

He saw her stretching her other hand to enclose his other hand but he made a sharp move away from her.

"You can't do anything about it."

He felt her hand go limp and for a moment held his breath because he knew she would drop his hand to catch her own tears for he could never do that for her. But she only stayed there rooted beside him holding his hand just as tightly as before and he could not stand it so he closed his eyes and when he felt drops dripping onto his hand he waited for the rain to come.

Few more days passed and he heard an apology from her and wished he could un-hear it because

"Sasuke-kun, I'm sorry I won't be here tomorrow and the next day until next week because I've been assigned to a mission and I know that winter's coming – "

With a significant amount of force, he had freed his hand from her clutch so tender that he did not want to dwell on the feeling because admitting what he felt was hard and not lying to her was harder so he said:

"It's none of my business. Good luck to your mission."

He did not say goodbye nor did he give her the chance to because he left her abruptly and he soon came to know what she must have felt like when he turned away and never looked back. It had been three weeks and Sakura was still not home and he could not feel home because his hand felt colder than before and it was all her fault because just _where the hell is her hand and where is she?_

He was on his fifth night of reacquainting himself with the cold because he decided to stop missing warmth and _her_ when he caught sight of Sakura with her pink strands and splatters of red and the viridian behind the shutters as she was being carried fast to the hospital.

It was a white night for him because he felt so so cold and he wanted warmth so he went as fast as he could to the hospital then to Tsunade whom upon seeing him _demand_ gave him the consent to run quickly to her student's side.

When he saw her oxygen mask fogged and her chest precariously dancing between upthenstop or downthenstop, he needed to believe that the breath issuing from Sakura's lips would be as warm as her hand which lay motionless beside her as if cuing him to come forward and touch it so that he could be rewarded with warmth.

He then hastily reached for her hand because he wanted to melt at the sight of her breathing but shrunk back just as fast when he touched ice. Her hand was so so cold perhaps colder than how his hand had been before she wrapped him with her warmth and he was ready to break that he ran out the door as fast as he could wishing the night rain would be bitingly cold. It would make him numb and forget about what was once warm and now cold.

He did not visit her again until the day he heard about her being discharged from that sterile room. It was daylight and snowing when he went to the hospital and saw her exiting the building with that cheery face she would always have and his gaze instinctively dropped to her hand.

When he saw her looking at him finally, he realized that there was also warmth in her eyes which he never took notice of before and his whole being burned with the desire to just stare into those pools of viridian forever with her hand in his.

Before he could even move towards her, she ran up to him, grabbed his hand for a second and let go of it. It was then that he realized he wanted a forever.

"Just checking if it's still cold, and it's not. Not anymore, Sasuke-kun."

She beamed at him and he wanted to monopolize her smile so it was he who grabbed her hand this time and brought it to his lips. After what seemed like eternity, he filled the spaces between her fingers with his so that her palm rested against his giving them the right to trap the warmth between them forever.

He then lifted his other hand to cup her cheek with his thumb smoothing the skin under her eye. He looked into her eyes which were registering shock and confusion and he just had to lean his forehead against hers because he felt greedy all of a sudden and knew that he would be for the rest of his life.

"It's snowing and I feel cold. Do something about it, Sakura."

She laughed amidst tears and they created warmth amidst the cold.

…

_**Fin.**_


End file.
